Tuesday, October 30th, 2007 by Adam Wagner
Why Ricardo Colclough Should Be Happy Tonight
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The Steelers cut under-performing CB Ricardo Colclough on Tuesday in order to pick up safety Anthony Madison. Outside of the fact that Madison may actually be useful as opposed to Colclough merely taking up a locker, there were several reasons that this relationship needed to end.
- He needs to find someone who can pronounce his name properly. Its not his fault that he was being born with a name spelled phonetically incorrect, but neither fans nor John Madden can decipher it. I’ve heard everything from Coalcough and Caulclough to Coalhoe, or, perhaps best of all, “Coca Cola”. Ricardo can finally find a place where the people can say his name. Maybe then he’ll finally be able to pick up a wide receiver in a crossing pattern.
- He needs to soften his lead hands. Colclough has seen more balls drop in front of him than Michael Jackson. I always like to think of cornerbacks as receivers who can’t catch, but Ricardo is ridiculous. He could have the ball in his hands, either for an easy interception or on a punt return, and just lose it. His hands are embarrassingly bad and will need to improve if he wants to catch on with another team.
- In his travels, Colclough may finally learn directions. On returns, he seemed to misunderstand that he was supposed to run north and south instead of east and west. Now, he can go back to school and learn that when someone says, “Run north to south!” they mean up and down, not left to right (and remember, the left hand always makes an L).
Regardless of his foibles, Colclough was always an interesting Steeler to have around. However, punt returns may actually be caught now, leading to less dramatic endings to football games, which is good if you are a Steeler fan and not so great if you’re a Browns or a Bengals fan. (In which case you should become a Steeler fan. Immediately. Before the Steelers beat your team again.)
Happy trails Ricardo.
xoxoxo







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